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Menage Au Twat

from C​*​untry Music by Shirley Gnome

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    Shirley's sophomoric CD, C*untry Music, features a compliment of professional musicians playing actual instruments. As a result, the album legitimately sounds like real music. Full studio production lends legitimacy to gloriously frank tales of anal romance, botched threesomes, and monogamous compromises. Digipack CD case.

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lyrics

MENAGE AU TWAT

A
my lover came and he said to me
Bm
I got a little fantasy
G
its all about you
F
its all about her
A
and its all about me

A
we can go home and enjoy each other
Bm
there's so much more love with another lover
G
don't tell me
F
you can't see the
A
beauty of her

C#m A
its all about the foreplay so
C#m A
forget about her vajayjay
C#m D Dm
to turn this down you'd be crazy, Shirlay
A Cm D
so why don't you and me,
E
make one plus two make three?

A
well that's really great
A
but i'm really straight
A
so get her away from me
D A
get her stinky vagina
E A
right out of my face
D A
get her stinky vagina
E Dm
right out of my face

well he stopped me right there on the patio stairs
put his hands in me underwears
suddenly,
he got more
persuasive

maybe it was the bottle of whiskey
drinking that shit always makes me frisky
cuz before ya knew it
we were getting down to it
2nd basin'

don't knock it til you try it
you can bake or steam or fry it
now i won't just imply it

cuz all of us got nakee
and crawled into my bed...

it was all really great
but i'm still really straight
just like I thought!
so get that stinky vagina
right out of my face
i don't care how drunk i am
the vag is a nasty place

Cm A
its like a baby slug
Cm A
crawled into a peach
Cm A
and the peach began to rot
Cm A
and it got all rubbery
Cm A
and then it rolled under the couch
Cm A
and it got covered in hair
Cm A
and then that chick she went and found it
Cm D
and shoved it in her underwear

Dm
ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

so i said to him
i won't do this again

cuz I think you're great
but I'll always be straight
that's why I like fucking you
how bout next time
bring over another dick
cuz now you owe me
E A
one man on each tit!
E A
one man on each tit!
E A
and one hand on each dick!

credits

from C​*​untry Music, released October 12, 2012

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Shirley Gnome Vancouver, British Columbia

From the west coast of Canada comes this multi-award winning cabaret musician, whose all-original, uncensored music about human nature is hilarious, honest, subversive, smart, empowering, taboo and not for the faint of heart. Her cleverly carnal lyrics go down smooth with her inappropriately gorgeous vocals, and her charm will disarm you through even the most provocative topics. ... more

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